I didn’t know that a day would come that will push me out to be on my own and that I would stumble upon somewhere which will bring me closer to the Self and let me fly with the wings of freedom…
Many ask me: What have you gained at PAF?
I can answer this only in terms of what all I lost!
- I lost weight… and became healthy; became light. The weight of accumulation of concepts that was lowering me down.
- I lost relatives… as I came to know how to relate to everything around—the trees, the tiny animals and the people whom I called relatives, that too with real understanding.
- I forgot that patterned dance… as I came to know the taste of Real dancing. From childhood, I was not allowed to learn dancing because of moral reasons, but I wanted to. It got suppressed. But in one of the camps, I was introduced to Anhad Kriya (a practice found by Acharya Ji, with fellow seekers dancing to the beat of the Dholak under the moon) On that day, the moon was above my head, and I danced madly to the beats of the Dholak by the river side. I cried that night. Something melted along with the suppression.
- I lost fear… a few years ago, I would leave sessions in the evening early out of fear that I would have to go alone at night. And now, that thought just do not arise.
- I lost hesitation… I was never able to talk to strangers without hesitation. My hands and legs would tremble before authorities. Never knew how to speak to people. Now, with Acharya Ji’s words in practice, I have been taking lectures at colleges, spreading my learnings at the canopies and inviting people to this transformation that I have gone through.
- I lost politeness… in the pretext of a polite person, I saw how violent I was with myself and others, and this realization, under the light of the teachings of Acharya Ji, I came to know what it is to be really friendly. And now I have better and more understandable relationships.
“When you are with right Guru, the whole existence itself is the Guru.”
The dog that travelled more than 15 km just because I hugged him for a while chose me to be his student. The way he made me walk with him and run is unforgettable. He was compassionate. I still remember how he went ahead and reached the camp before, and rested in Acharya Ji’s lap, and then sat beside Him in the session.
That day, the moon overhead became the GURU in his presence. The river with its flow taught me something.
Every butterfly I see, every flower that blooms, the tiny animal that I come across and every face I encounter, the breeze that blows gently on a sunny afternoon, the noise I hear amidst heavy traffic, the garbage I see around with the mighty bull that stands in it without being affected, all became Guru.
There is nothing but gratitude.