This is the mistake that you are making.
You are continuing to have a ‘subject-object’ relationship with the Teacher.
And if you want to remain an ‘object’, it is imperative for you that the Teacher remains a ‘subject’.
And where there is an ‘object’ and there is a ‘subject’, there would always be a distance.
The ‘subject’ and the ‘object’ cannot be one.
They determine each other, they work upon each other, they play with each other, still they maintain a distance between them.
The subject, the object and the distance, all go together.
And as long as there is the distance, how can there be dissolution?